This is something that has been on my mind lately and I just felt the need to share with the world, because being a housewife is not what I set out to do in life, but I have learned a few things along the way and other’s may be able to relate, especially to this one. So for better or worse, here goes.
What do I mean by don’t rush to grow up? I am pretty sure every single parent will tell their child this at one point in their life, I know my mom used to tell me all the time. I never truly realized what it meant until now. Here I am on the edge of my mid-thirties and I am glad I did not rush to grow up. My husband laughs at me some days (ok, probably most days) because I had a very “sheltered” upbringing. Now, it probably wasn’t what you are thinking, I knew a ton and experienced so much – the good, the bad, and the ugly of being a teenager and young adult, but I always knew that I had a long life ahead of me so I never rushed to grow up and be more of an adult. I have met so many people in my life that say they wish they could go back to being a teenager or college kid and actually enjoy the experiences that they had rushed through so quickly. I don’t have those thoughts, I had an amazing experience, just like I am having now as an adult – mortgage and all.
I laugh to myself some days as I sit at our kitchen table and work on my blog or other business ventures we have going on, because so many people think that my husband and I “go without” a ton in order for me to be at home, and that is not the case. Now don’t get me wrong, we aren’t going to Europe or anything during the year, but there are a few reasons why I am able to stay at home and live the life we have. For starters, the whole don’t rush to grow up – I took a job right after college that allowed me to not have to pay rent at all. That is huge when you are just starting out, so instead, I took what would have been rent money and invested it. I am pretty sure most housewives don’t have a 401K and a secret bank account. Well, not so secret anymore, my husband knows about it now since our finances are controlled by our financial planner, another very wise choice we made to be living this life – hire the people who are smarter than you.I have these things because when you don’t pay rent it is amazing. The thing my husband did – he lived at home until 6 months before we got married. People may think this is weird, but let me tell you, we saved a ton of money and that is what gave us the ability to then go and pay a stupid amount of money in rent when we lived outside Philadelphia (bad decision, but the only one we have so far in life, so not too bad). Why everyone is so quick to leave their parents house is crazy in my mind, especially with the amount of student debt kids are coming out of college with and that they very rarely can pay all of it on their own. By not paying rent for the first 3 years after college graduation I was able to pay off my student loans in half the time, get a master’s degree (that I don’t currently use, sorry dad) and we just paid off my husband’s loans, which was more than what our brand new Range Rover cost, education needs to get its act together, and soon. But that is a rant for another day.
I will say this, not being so quick to grow up has allowed my husband and I the ability to grow up together. Some of the little things that married couples worry about or argue over, we just don’t. We really could not begin to tell you what our last fight was about because we just don’t have them. We talk everything out and basically do life as one person. We didn’t have a mortgage until we were almost thirty. We always paid all our bills on time, carrying a credit card balance is dumb. We don’t have cable because it’s ridiculous what that costs, and we try to live a very minimal lifestyle – aside from my horrible shopping addiction, but it is an addiction that we can afford for me to have.
I always had amazing parents who were open and honest about the cost of living. I knew it was going to be a ton and take a lot to live the life I always dreamed of, so for me, not rushing to become an adult helped me to save so much and prepare for what was around the corner – bills, bills, bills, and more bills. Oh, and don’t forget about taxes, those things kill us quarterly, but we still smile and laugh and write the check after a nice glass of red wine.
So, when your mother tells you not to be in a rush to grow up, listen, she knows what she is talking about. I will never have kids to be able to turn into my mother and say, don’t be so quick to grow up, which is why I decided to take to the blog and tell the general audience of life. Enjoy the moments but don’t worry so much about the future.